For years I have been thinking that our monster (fear) is something that we either run away from or confront! But today I decided to introduce a new concept that I learned from the school of my role model Virginia Satir, whose knowledge is passed to me through my beloved teachers and mentors Sharon and Aznive, which mainly talks about loving all our parts…the angry part…the calm part…the ugly part…the nice part…the judging part…the joyful part…and the fearful part.

Don’t get astonished! Because as human we comprise many parts that we need to embrace and love…On this matter, I’d like you on daily basis to check on your fearful part…see what is bothering it? what does it need? and what is it trying to tell you? listen carefully to the message it is holding for you with love…take it with love…embrace it with love…and deal with it with love….

Often times we tend to reject this fearful part…and tell it: how dare you come up here?!!! I am supposed to be brave and courageous?!!! and the little loving fearful part shrunk away and says: myself doesn’t love me…I better curl up in my place and never go up again…it seems like a satisfying option yah?!

But if you want the truth it’s the worst thing you can do to yourself! because once this part is rejected and feel suppressed for so long, it might go and cling to one of your weak organs and affect your health…or it might combine with other rejected parts and clog the flow of energy in your body…or maybe all those parts will sometime later turn into a destructive force that suddenly comes out without you realizing it…or maybe….there are thousands of maybe reactions none of which will contribute into your happiness…

You’ll ask yourself, so maybe if I run away from it and avoid situations that will trigger my fears, that would be a better situation. But that is again another form of rejection! as if you are afraid of fear… don’t want to feel fearful… and don’t want to be in a situation that brings this part up!

And you might tell me: but I am doing this out of love? and I’ll tell you that is a selfish love…not genuine love…as if you are tricking yourself by not being in a situation that might allow this part to have a voice…and again you are indirectly telling it: you are not welcomed in my world!

So, Reem, you may ask: what do you want me to do? and in simple words I’ll tell you: live your life as it goes freely…like a wave of water… and once the fear nocks your door, which you’ll definitely know about by slowing down, and checking your body organs, look at it… take it towards you…embrace it …accept it…calm it…and then take the control and take action. Let your actions and choices always come out of love.

Having that said, I want you to understand that there are risky situations in which you have all the right to protect yourself from, like approaching a wild animal or touching fire, these are things that you would certainly want to protect yourself from because again you chose to act out of love.